Are you the last hurrah?
Lately, I get the distinct feeling that relationship-wise, I am the equivalent of a bachelor party to a groom. That is, I’m viewed as the crazy, day-filling good time that guys opt for in the lead up to trip overseas. Now – you should know that this is not a horn tooting on my part – i don’t view it as a particularly good thing – nor do i think it’s because i’m so great. What i do know, is that when it does finally come time to say ‘Bon Voyage’, the boys may have the suitcases – but i’m definitely the one left with the baggage. Emotional baggage that is.
The last two ‘relationships’ i’ve invested in have culminated in both boys heading overseas. Now, that in itself is fine – i was made perfectly aware each time that said boy would eventually be jetting off – so a big emotional investment was not on the cards. However, knowing i shouldn’t do something – normally means i end up doing it – and doing it well.
So each time when said boy has left – i’ve felt a lot worse than originally planned – because i invested myself emotionally far more that i intended. The annoying thing you have to realise, is they probably don’t give the situation, or you, a second thought once they pass those airport gates. They’re traveling – and my guess is the only thing they’ve invested in is the plane ticket and probably a packet of Durex’s finest. My question to myself? Why am i starting up these ‘close friendships’ or toned-down relationships when i know they’ll come to a halt in a matter of months?
Have you ever been the last hurrah? Did you end up feeling worse than you thought you would?