What does it mean: when guys bag out other guys


There are two ways in which this normally goes down.

The first is with the platonic guy friend. So you’re sitting around, chilling with your platonic guy friend, you know, a real good buddy – the guy that it’s totally acceptable to spill your guy issues with – and normally he’s all great with the shoulder, even not saying too much, just kind of listening – or pretending to listen, with a couple of opinions, but not more than required. And you like that it’s what he can offer you that your girlfriends can’t.

The second is when you’re sitting with a guy you have history with. He could be an ex that you’re trying to be ‘friends’ with, or a guy that you’ve developed history with. And you think that chatting about relationships is a way to inject a bit of normality into your relationship. Because it’s what you do with your other friends. You’re going to move on eventually and if you’re going to be friends with this person, then chatting about other guys or girls is just all part of the process.

So what does it mean when he starts paying out any guy you mention?

Well, in the case of the first circumstance, perhaps you’ve thrown this guy into the ‘buddy basket’ a little too swiftly. Are you sure there’s nothing going on between you too? (you naughty so and so!) Even if nothing has happened, or can happen (due to him having a girlfriend, or some other annoying detail) it doesn’t mean he doesn’t have feelings for you. Even if the feelings are subtle, or simply protective, protective of you – because he does care about you – love you even. If you’re close friends, he’s probably just really protective and a little cynical of any guy that comes and swoops in to take you off his hands. A word to the wise: normally these guys stick around for a while, and there’s a good chance you realise what’s in front of your face and end up with them. Naw, sop fest or what?

Then there’s the second scenario. With the ex flame. Well, you know he’s just got a wee case of the green eyed monster. He bags these guys you mention because he doesn’t want to think that they’re adequate to him. That you’ll ever find anything as good as him. Men are shallow, scared little creatures at the best of times, they need self assurance of their worth. I’ll bet you all my serums and scrubs that he’s sitting there squirming while you talk about another dude, and the only way he can cope is ito diss him. Even if what you had is dead and buried, cremated even – 0dds are he can’t shake that feeling of ‘owning you.’ He’ll probably never be totally cool with hearing about other guys in your life. But if you’re really keen to allow a friendship to grow from this, then you need to ensure you’re willing to talk about other girls too. Let him know you are willing to be there for him as well, you know – be his shoulder.

However, check this before you proceed with your little scheme. If you’re doing this, you know, doing all you can to get close to him again – just as friends – purely to make him jealous, then make sure you’re careful. Because he may just turn around and be really happy for you – and then what will you do?

 

 

NQC x

 

Have you ever come across a jealous ex?

Do you have a friend that you’ve put in the buddy basket that may not deserve to be there?

You do it to piss him off, dontcha?

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