Is he playing the ‘numbers game?’

It’s been happening for generations. Perhaps since the dawn of time.

Men, trying to justify their promiscuousness – claiming that it’s nature, ‘the biological urge to spread their seed.’ Ha! What a super-sized load of bee ess man. Girls, it’s a cover up. An alibi, so they can attempt to get away with being man whores and upping their numbers, to beat the boys. It’s playground rules really. Old school shit. Trying to out-do each other at a sport – and this time we’re not talking cricket and footy stakes.

By the time boys begin to grow up and realise what having a penis means and how it works, they’re already mind-humping girls – the mission seared into their brains, like a message from birth. But what is the mission you ask? To use the thing between their legs as soon as possible. The target? Anyone really, boys in their early teens aren’t traditionally fussy. It could be a anyone, and I mean anyone that gets the job done. This is where the urge to ‘spread their seed’ comes into play. Guys think just because the fact that they’re horny literally all the time, means that it’s their profound destiny to do god’s work and spread that seed, yaknow, sew those wild oats.

But let me tell you, there is nothing in the bible about attempting to lay every fit filly about town – this is not a cattle farm and you are no bull dear boy. No-one is relying on you to keep the population going. So down boy.

So I guess teenage boys, new to the magic of their penis’ can be somewhat forgiven for their blinded foray into the mystery that is laying women, but when a guy hits the 20 mark, you’d think he’d know better by now, right? Wrong. Very wrong. Dead bloody wrong infact chaps.

It’s a term I’m hearing around a fair bit lately. And I know of at least 3 groups of males who are partaking in this ridiculous charade. It’s the ‘numbers game’ and I guarantee you, it’s being played in a guy group near you.

Basically it’s exactly how it sounds. A group of guys see how many girls each of them can lay in a certain amount of time, say six months, or a year. The winner gets nothing but the glory (glory for what? I’m still not sure) and that’s about it.

Because I mean, the satisfaction of bedding 20+? 30+? nameless girls can’t be real? Without sounding like a 1940’s no-sex-til-marriage-you-naughty-so-and-so’s-prude, each of these girls has (hopefully) consented to this bit of fun, thinking that you refer to her as Mia Smith, or at ┬áleast Mia with the gorgeous green eyes – not #17.

So boys, I guess the lesson here is really very simple. If you’re indulging in a number’s game style of play; a) I strongly suggest you get yourself checked out immediately, b) you best keep this information to yourself because I guarantee you that any girl worth her weight in bang on trend faux fur vests won’t be likely to touch you with a ten foot pole, and c) figure out fast that sex with just one person can be more fulfilling than 10,000 slightly awkward, not very intimate one night stands with jenny, or was it julie? from that party, or was it bah mitzvah? Oh and fellas? I’m going to leave you with four words – and I’m going to need you to take note.

It’s quality – not quantity.


Do you know a guy playing the ‘numbers game?’

Have you been a ‘number?’

Do you yourself play this game? What number are you up to sport?