When should he stop paying?
This is the quintessential question for all new couples (especially when you’re 16 and your date makes his money babysitting his rugrat little brother), but when should the boy stop paying for stuff?
Now I can be very much in love with the idea of love, and I also think of myself as a bit of a feminist, so although part of me likes to think I can pay my own way, I also do love being completely and utterly spoiled, especially in the deliciously juicy beginning parts of a new relationship.
You know what i’m talking about, the precious weeks when he’s doing all he can to impress you and try to sweep you off your feet. He’s grabbing the movie, the take-away and the wine, not to mention last nights 1 month anniversary dinner at ARIA and you begin to forget that you’re a hard-working woman with a matching salary, you just want to curl up in the bundle of love and be spoiled rotten by your dreamy dude.
I went through this with my first boyfriend, he literally couldn’t do enough for me. Surprise outings here, random gifts there and I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. That is, until it all stopped a few months down the track. You see, eventually, boys run out of stamina, and they run out of money. Both of which can be a rather large hurdle in your road to Blissville.
You can’t help but think him suddenly wanting to split everything means that the delicious first few months of the relationship are over, the honeymoon period has ended, and you’re now forced to join the ranks as just another boring couple.
But you’re wrong.
Boys sometimes put their foot in it from the start by spoiling girls with gifts and magical dinners every other night. There is a natural expectancy that starts to come with that after a while, and then he checks his bank balance and has to try and wein her off them, without making it seem like it’s something she’s done.
Fellas, here’s a hint. I think it’s lovely in the ‘courting period’ (let’s be honest, there isn’t much of that going on anymore) rather, during the first few romps, if you pay for the post-coital milkshake, her footy ticket (or her taxi home – you know, if you really like her), but be forewarned. Going too far too soon can lead to nothing but trouble. That’s not to say you shouldn’t whip out a surprise or two every now and then, it’ll make her very thankful, and who knows, you may even receive a few ‘surprises’ of your own in return…
– side note: the kind of surprises and ‘treats’ that girls and guys want are normally pretty different. I think my tone demonstrated that, but just in case – now you know.
When do you think it should start being split 50/50?
FYI boys – buying dinner doesn’t guarantee you sex afterwards, it helps, but doesn’t guarantee it. So don’t expect, yadig?